Seeking Advice

I love when my kids were younger and they would ask me advice on how to "fix something" or "do something".  This type of curiosity is why I spent years captive to outlet plug protectors, cabinet child proof locks and even at one time a bike lock on the fridge!   (Don't judge if you have not waken up to your kids finger painting with eggs on the floor of your kitchen!!!!)

What I love about their request is that really they have no intention of listening to you most of the time.   What they want is to get your attention so that they can show you how they are going to do it.

Questions like:

"Mommy when I climb on top of this bunk bed and jump off onto the bean bag should I wear my batman cape or my superman cape?"   ....The question is can I do this but they disguise it with an option of which super hero can make this leap safely.  (and yes, this almost happened in our house - thanks to Kagan!)

" Mommy which do you think would be better if I use this paint to color my bedroom walls or would you like me to paint yours and Daddy's room with it?"  Hopefully you were paying close attention and realized they said WALLS and did not mistake this for a just a picture to hang on the wall.

Yet we often soliciate this same kind of advice from our friends too, don't we?   We just throw out a scenario to see if someone will validate what we have already made our mind up to do.   Many times though we are just praying that someone will give us hope to defy what we know is actually possible.

Questions like:
  
"My boyfriend cheated on me a few times but I think that he is really going to change.  What do you think I can do to make sure he does not cheat on me again."  Seriously, you know to get out while you can but hoping someone will give you an answer that you don't already know.

"My husband has been in a coma for two years now and the doctors say he will never recover to the man he was so should pull his life support?  Do you think someone can make a full recovery after that long on life support?"  Your heart breaks to know that the answer of the fact that a miracle is the only possibility for a situation like this but you just can't let go.

"I feel a lump in my breast.  I wonder if it could just a fluke?  Do you think I should just wait and see what it does in a few months before I go the doctor?"  You surely don't want to face the outcome of what it could be so if no one confirms it then it does not exist.

I don't always want to the answers that life gives.  Yet, there are so many times that even when I know the answer in my gut I just want to force someone else to say it aloud.   Sometimes you just need advice from others to help you accept what you already know and that is okay.  At least you get someone to share with and confide in so that you can decide how to proceed.